My relationship with my intended parents
I have been a surrogate twice! I have worked with both intended parents that live close to me and IPs who live far from me. The relationship with both my intended parents required work. One of them even had a little bit of a language barrier that we had to work at. That didn’t stop the relationship from growing, it only made me more open-minded. I would not say one relationship is stronger than the other but I do see one set of intended parents more than the other. I am very humble and grateful for the relationships that I do have with each set of intended parents.
My first set of intended parents’ relationships started rough. Nothing bad happened and everything went super smooth. One day work-up went smoothly, the legal process was very smooth and no one disagreed on anything. The thing we struggled with the most was communication. They speak plenty of English it was just very hard to understand their English. Our solution to the language barrier was to text instead of talk face to face. We had a group text that we utilized a lot. These intended parents were a man and a woman. I bring this up because the woman was unable to carry her own children, so that came with the trauma and struggle that she had to deal with. I was not going to complain at all to her about my pregnancy because I knew that she would carry if she could and I didn’t want to bring up any trauma. I felt I needed to suck it up and do what I signed up to do.
My second set of intended parents were two males. Telling them about all my pregnancy complaints felt ok to do. They enjoyed hearing about them because they would go and google what that meant for the baby. I would love to say that the communication was better with them, but it was not. It was mostly just simple texts exchanged. So that was something I had to get used to but I expressed to them that I needed a little bit more communication from them.
I still have strong relationships with both sets of parents and I do get consistent updates. I would not change anything about ether relationships because that is just who they are, and who am I to change that? In the end, the goal was met and relationships were built and my family and I will always have those. If you have a specific type of intended parents you want to work with or just want to create that special relationship as a surrogate give us a call or reach out via email. We are always willing to share our stories with you.