Assisted Reproductive Technology for the LGBTQ Community

Being a gay parent, whether in a relationship or as a single parent, has its challenges, no doubt. Deciding to start a family is a big step and takes a lot of thought and consideration but thankfully, today, there are several options for the LGBTQ community when it comes to growing your family. The option of adoption is a well known avenue and has been around for awhile. Foster-to-adopt is also an option where parents foster children until they are able to adopt them. Both of these have their advantages and disadvantages and most know of someone who has done one option or the other. A lesser known and newer option for the LGBTQ community to grow their family is gestational surrogacy.

Thanks to the advancement of technology, specifically assisted reproductive technology, it is now possible for same sex couples (or singles) to use donor eggs or donor sperm and/or their own (or any combination) to create an embryo and transfer that embryo to a gestational surrogate who will then carry the baby for the intended parent(s) for the entire pregnancy. This process is called gestational surrogacy.

What are some advantages of gestational surrogacy? A huge one for some people is being able to be genetically related to the baby if they choose. The intended mother or father can use (although it’s not necessary) their egg(s) or sperm along with donor sperm or egg to create the embryo which means the baby would be genetically-related, which is something many same-sex couples not long ago didn’t have the option to do. To some, it’s important to carry on their part of the family tree, DNA or family name. If you have a gestational carrier who is willing to do a double embryo transfer, it’s also possible to do a transfer using DNA from BOTH partners (i.e. an egg from each female partner or sperm from each male partner) in order to try for two babies - one that’s genetically related to each parent. Isn’t technology amazing?

Another advantage is a beautiful thing called a “Pre-Birth Order.” This document – a court order – gives all parental rights to the IPs, including ordering that the IPs’ names should go on the child’s birth certificate and the IPs have the right to name their child. This document also removes the gestational carrier from having any parental rights or obligations for the child once it is born. So you don’t have to worry about the gestational surrogate “leaving with the baby” as many uneducated people may warn you. Anyone pursuing gestational surrogacy should research carefully, though, as not all states allow Pre-Birth Orders, and even those that do sometimes restrict the configuration of family allowed to use it. New Mexico is a great option for ALL family types as their judicial system imposes none of those restrictions.

One last advantage that many love is being able to be involved in the pregnancy from the very beginning. With surrogacy, not only do you get to pick who will be carrying your baby, you’ll get to be involved every step of the way after. From the embryo being transferred into the gestational surrogate, to all the doctor’s appointments along the way, to being at the birth should you choose. This is very important to many intended parents and lets them feel very connected to their baby from the very beginning. 

Ultimately, you’ll need to pick the option to growing your family that fits you and your partner (if you have one) the best, but it’s good to know that there are several options available. To discuss your option of gestational surrogacy, set up your free consultation with New Mexico Surrogacy today.